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Ridgewood, New York, United States

Friday, April 15, 2011

Meditations on the Kiss

A devoted spirit once kissed me and I ran away, I left him on an island in tears. I was searching for another kiss. This one this time from the betrayer who is still burning buried in his shadowed existence. I hope he moves to Antwerp very soon and marries someone who will take his shit for treasures. Because for all my showers of gold on his darkend skull, he still betrayed me with his oozing salival bath. This will always bring me sadness. And right now it is an echo of sadness, but sadness still.

I don't look to intimidate you with a kiss. In fact if you end up in my bed, there is no way I will let you touch my lips until you admit that you are trapped. Vulnerable in my web. Soft and gentle. Go to sleep. Then I will kiss you on your forehead little bear. I am now your mother, too much like her and not enough unlike. Shit, it happens again and again and again.

My mother was beautiful and cunning and trapped my father. But she forgot her beauty through the years, never taught me her mysteries and instead replaced it with a scornful temeprament that aged her twofold. He was a cheater a liar, simply the best human he could possibly be. A stalker, a charlatan, a charitable soul to everyone except his own.

A kiss from him felt like the earth, dirty and destroyed. A kiss from her - I'm not sure I remember. These days she kisses like a child. my brother is cold my sister is tired. In fact a familial kiss is the only ritual we are all embarrased to admit.

Tonight I will attempt a kiss with a poem, the poet's soul. Imagine longing and push out from my lips a subtle devotion to the spirit that inhabits the creation.

Come to HiChristina tonight @10pm 5-min lectures plus me doing a Kissing meditation.

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